Antioch Ep 202 Oh Grod The Freedom!

oh smap! Yeah 4-4 this A.MM.I.T. is great.
You need to get one. What? Oh, oh it’s time? Okay. Oh… I don’t feel so good… *Body hits ground* ♪ Opening Theme ♪ Digit Scan Commence Identity Confirmed Retinal Scan Commence Identity Confirmed You get a chance to check out the new
system yet? Yeah Ansel said that they were able to
boost our signal so we don’t get a repeat of the Solomon Banner incident. ♪I’m Black Y’all, I’m Black y’all, I’m blackety Black cause I’m black y’all♪ You hear that? ♪ no it sounds like… Classical Music… hang on… ♪ How Black? ♪ ♪Super Black♪ ♪dark black, chocolate black light black medium♪ Hello? Who’s out there? What? Who’s out there? Are… Are you talking to me? Yeah you, the singing Where are you? Oh, don’t know, just floating around space. Floating around? You’re not in a ship? Oh, no, no, no! No, I haven’t been in a ship in like… two years maybe? no… Charlie? Charlie, is that you? OH SMAP! MeLia! knew I recognized your voice! Man! I-I must have hallucinating
talking to you like three or four times a week! Wow it’s good to hear from you Hey? You still bench-pressing those space whales? What? Oh, uh, never mind that- that’s a hallucination. Charlie… We had a funeral for you! I mean last year I even did a Re-Morial Oh Wow! A Re-Morial that’s like for heroes! I’m I’m touched. You know I met with Admiral Reaser just the other day oh man he’s got so many
heroic stories. Just really a great great guy. Charlie Admiral Reaser died like five years ago remember? You spoke at his Re-morial. oh I guess that didn’t happen either. It- It’s so hard to tell out here nowadays *LAUGHS* I didn’t know, did you know? I didn’t know. I’m just guessing. How are you still alive? Funny story I guess since I didn’t
actually die, my bio-flex scanner never logged my death in with the payroll
system. So, every week I just keep getting paid. Wait, that still doesn’t explain how you’re still alive after two years In SPACE *vehicle approaches* Hey-hey! Hey Rico! Here we go! Oh, oh boy! I’ve been waiting all week for this Waiting all week for what? Charlie what’s going on out there? How are you still alive ? Look, like I said, I’m still getting paid So, use those extra credits for food, water, some CO2 scrubbers for my At-mos, uh, some new batteries for my force field I get just enough so I can make it through to another week. *whistling* Ahh…which one? Which one…? Oh empty *humming* Ahh…there we go. so you’ve just been ordering takeout? Why didn’t you just order a ride back to the Antioch? *LAUGHS* I can’t afford a ride Whoo! I can just barely get enough supplies to last my to my next paycheck. if I tried to save enough credits for a ride I’d never survive long enough to take *LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY* A RIDE! A RIDE! *LAUGHS* I can’t. I can’t leave I can’t get outta here. Charlie ? You okay bruh? Oh yeah! I’m wonderful.
What’s been going on with you guys ? Oh… I mean I don’t know I guess you’ve been
gone for two years I mean the biggest thing is we don’t work for Bannerflex
anymore How’s that possible? Bannerflex built the Antioch. The Antioch’s been a Bannerflex Ship for 150 years Well New management decided that that they wanted to have a tournament to decommission the ships. They made us fight each other to the death. Oh SMAP! Yeah, I know! We blew up the Corinth. Oh, well now I know this is a hallucination. Then what happened? uhh… Well, I guess… In all the confusion, you know the tournament and everything We got poached by Happy Smile Corp. OH! I hear they have a great insurance plan. Yeah, they were great. Except for all the mind control. Oh, that’s why they’re all so happy yeah pretty much. So, you work for Happy Smile then? Ha! no. The mind control implants didn’t work
on most of us, ’cause of the Antioch’s practice of of cross-species transplants and
biomechanical enhancements you know for me it was my broadcast implant it
shorted it right out So, they let you go? Ha! oh no no no no no no no no no no no no
no no no no no No if you don’t have a working implant
they execute you for company Non-Complaince So, doctor Pazuzu removed all
of the malfunctioning chips which was pretty much everybody except for captain
Reaser. His works perfectly for some reason. So, she’s still trying to figure
out how to take his out safely. Wait…Wait, Doctor Pazuzu? What happened to Dr.
Reaser? Oh, Right! Last year Charlotte she contracted this
demon parasite it calls itself Pazuzu Overlord of Darkness and Eater of Worlds
it’s still like a doctor though so, What are you gonna do? How’s captain Reaser taking all this? Well… Okay, you didn’t hear this from me but I think he likes her better this way. And if I’m really honest? I do too. Girl you wrong for that What Dr. Pazuzu is way nicer than that tranch Charlotte. *alarm* Oh! Breaktime’s over. Hold on. You know, maybe we can come pick you up. I can
try to home in on your signal and- No, no no no! don’t do that Why not? We can save you, Charlie. I’m good Mellie. I’m so good, In the early days, you know when I was out here, I used to think about being rescued. I was so
scared then. But as the days passed and I I didn’t die, I just reassessed my
situation. It’s beautiful out here. The vast emptiness of space is beautiful and then
the freedom Oh Grod The Freedom! This has been probably the best two
years of my life. I really found myself. I even wrote a novel Wow, you wrote a book? I’d love to read it. Oh Yeah! I mean I submitted it to a neutron star I met
about a month ago he seemed real receptive
I think he’s gonna publish it That’s great lieutenant. You know if you change your mind I’ve got a boosted signal now so you can call me any time and I will
see about getting a shuttle out to you or you know if you just want to talk Thanks, girl. This has been by far, the best
hallucination I’ve had in these past three or four months easy. You take care of yourself now. ♪Booty booty booty booty rocking everywhere♪ ♪Booty booty booty booty rocking everywhere♪ ♪Booty booty booty booty rocking everywhere♪ ♪Booty booty booty booty rocking everywhere♪ Good morning crew of the Antioch. StartDate
103 5368 And now for the morning announcements You know, before we get started today I
just want to say that I know it’s been a really really really really tough couple
of years aboard the Antioch And I think we should just take a moment to reflect
and honor some of our lost and fallen teammates.

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