Are America and Iran on the Brink of War? | The Daily Show



That's right. America is
sending thousands of troops back to the Middle East,
which is a big deal, and not just because you have
to pay that E-Z Pass again. No, it's also because
this could lead to war. So when America says
Iran is responsible, they better have
some solid proof. MAN: The U.S. military released
this surveillance footage, which American officials
tell NBC News shows Iranian sailors removing an
unexploded mine from the side of one of the tankers
after it was attacked. MAN 2:
Fragments of mines, and the magnets used
to attach them, made by Iran, says the U.S., to attack oil tankers
last week. More proof, say U.S.
officials, of Iranian guilt. Iranian fingerprints apparently
all over an attack that Iran denies carrying out. Iranian fingerprints? (laughter) Honestly, I, uh… I don't really know
what that last part means. How… how you can tell
that fingerprints are Iranian? Was the detective like… (sniffs)
"I knew it. Hummus." (laughter) "Wait, wait.
Hummus isn't Iranian." "I know, but if i said sabzi,
you wouldn't have got the joke." So the U.S. claims
that they have enough evidence to prove this attack was carried
out by Iran, right? But because America has
a history of crying wolf in the Middle East, some
of the U.S.'s allies have said that they need a little bit more
than hummus fingers to be convinced. WOMAN:
U.S. allies remain split about the allegations
against Iran. Japan expressing skepticism, while Germany's
foreign minister stating, the video provided by the U.S.
is not sufficient proof. That's right. Japan– whose ship was attacked,
by the way– isn't sure that it was Iran. And Germany doesn't want
to rush into any decisions. And I get it.
Both of those countries have a bad history with war,
especially Germany. Yeah, they know how they get
when there's a war. The Germans are like, "I think
we all should proceed carefully and think about…" "No, Germany,
you need to get angry." "Please, nein. "You wouldn't like me
when I'm angry. "Last time this happened, I woke up in Argentina
with a Spanish wife." (laughter) Now, after some convincing,
Germany eventually accepted America's conclusion
blaming Iran. And because of the whole weapons
of mass destruction thing, you can't blame America's allies
for being a little cautious when taking America's word
for it, all right? 'Cause America's
done this before. Imagine if your friend told you,
"Oh, my God, you got to get down
to this party. Rihanna's here." But then when you got to
the party, instead of Rihanna, you just found
some middle-aged guy named Ryan. Yeah. You'd be like,
"What? That-That's not Rihanna. This guy's just standing
in the corner." He's like, "Yeah, all I do
is work, work, work, work, work. That's all I do." If that happened to you,
you wouldn't trust your celebrity-sighting friends
ever again. And there is
a growing agreement. There is a growing agreement
that this looks like it was an attack
conducted by Iran, but people
are also preaching caution because maybe it was
Iran's government, or maybe it was a rogue element
within Iran, or maybe it was someone
trying to frame Iran, like a jealous ex. Who knows? So, despite
Mike Pompeo's hawkishness and John Bolton's walrusness, most foreign governments
aren't in a hurry to go to war. But there's another person who also doesn't like
the idea of war, and you'll never guess
who it is. NEWSMAN: President Trump is
now playing down the attacks, telling Time magazine… (reading): We'll see what happens. They are
a much different country today than they were
two and a half years ago when I came into office. When President Obama
signed that horrible deal, they were screaming,
"Death to America." I haven't been
hearing that lately. NEWSWOMAN:
President Trump has said he doesn't want to go to war. I love how the press is just, like, waiting
outside of his house, as well. "Are you in a fight with Iran?" "I hope not!" (laughter) But, yes, it turns out, President Trump is not keen
on a war with Iran, which I am all for. I mean, maybe he thinks
that this is a bad idea, or maybe he's just worried that the military might try
and draft him again, you know? It's like, "Mr. President, we
recommend a war against Iran." "Ow, my bone spurs are back.
They're back. They come back every 50 years." So, the good news is
despite his Twitter fingers, Trump is not a fan
of trigger fingers. But don't get
too comfortable yet because, unfortunately, there
are lots of people around him trying to change his mind. NEWSMAN: The hawks continue
to circle this president, urging him toward action. They're in his ear
making the case for possible intervention. NEWSWOMAN: You have
Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, National Security Advisor
John Bolton, who are a lot more hawkish, who want to be more aggressive in their stance
toward the Iranians. NEWSMAN 2: Last week,
Pompeo went to Congress and delivered a presentation arguing that
this administration could use the same authorization of force
the Bush White House used in the fight against al-Qaeda
after 9/11. Wow. Did-did you pick up
what they just said there? 18 years later,
Mike Pompeo and his friends are trying to use 9/11
as an excuse to go to war
with another country that had nothing to do
with 9/11. That's what they want. Yeah. And, I mean, haven't the troops
spent enough time in the Middle East?
Just bring them home. They deserve it. Yeah. Just bring them home. (cheering and applause) They deserve to come home. And we deserve to see more of those adorable
dog reunion videos. Yeah. Which, by the way, like, you know there's got to be
one dog who just doesn't give a shit,
right? There's probably one dog where
the guy's like, "I'm home," and he's like, "Hey. "Larry, right? "Oh, yeah,
I guess you used to live here. "All right, well, uh,
I'm gonna go look at a bird, but thank you for your service,
I guess?" Look, man, here's the thing. I'm not saying
America should never fight wars. Right? That's who you are.
I get it. But do you really think now is
the time to start another war? 'Cause it almost feels like… it almost feels
like America does war the same way people do Netflix,
you know? Yeah, we start
a bunch of things, but we never really commit,
you know? People just hang out.
"Oh, my God, "You know what I heard
could be great? This new war, Iran." People are like,
"Yeah. Oh, but wait. "We still need to finish Iraq. "Yeah. Yeah, we still need
to finish that. "Oh, and aren't we still
in the middle of Syria? "Whatever happened there? Yeah,
I couldn't follow the plot. "There were so many bad guys. "By the way, who started Niger? "Is someone using our account?
What is that? "Oh, my God, I just realized "we never even finished
Afghanistan. "We started that,
like, 20 years ago. So, what are we gonna pick?" "Actually, I'm tired.
Let's just go to bed." (laughter) All I'm saying is this.
All I'm saying is this. I'm saying I understand
America can't not fight a war, but instead of going
with a streaming model, maybe America should switch back to the old-school DVD plan,
all right? You can start a new war as soon as you finish
the ones you already have.

46 thoughts on “Are America and Iran on the Brink of War? | The Daily Show

  • You just don't have enough ball's to attack us….. trump is a pussy and pentagon is a joke…..we love american people…..

  • We should go to war. It's time. Our economy needs a boost
    Cough
    Cough
    WW2
    Cough
    Vietnam
    Cough
    Contra
    Afghanistan
    Grenada
    Desert Storm
    Iraq Invasion
    Syria

    Sorry….when I cough sometimes it gets away from me

  • How naive, Trevor their aim is not to win wars their aim is to start wars, how will they sell their weapons?

  • The problem isn't that America starts wars. The biggest issue is the general population and the people even though they may oppose it at the start, they forget and don't give a damn after a short while. They are a vile people who have no moral compass and no backbone. They are a morally degenerate society which provides for the buoyancy needed to keep evil American politicians and the Presidents afloat.

  • If America sends their police officers to pull over Iranian vessels, Iranians will be fucked. No way they gonna get away with just a warning.
    Keep your fucking hands on the wheel Iran, or else…

  • He: <Bring them back to the home!!!>
    Me: what were they doing in other countries?!
    I'm Iranian; it's been more than 100 years since The U.S. started living in our region (Middle East )!!!
    as it has been the country that always claims about human rights and all kinds of rights for everyone and everything!!!
    I hope that an American answer me. What is The U.S. doing in this region?( with more than 10000 km distance!)
    Maybe you know…

  • Just getting more people worldwide to hate the Us and trying to add even more 'war history' to student's books.

  • Trump knows if he goes to fight against Iran america will lose thats why he sticked his dick back in his pants

  • totally agree , it is messed up here enough for another war !, sometimes you pray for a miracle that you know won't come !

  • End suffering. Go full auto! nein nein! Waffengesetze haben volles Auto weggenommen! Dann lass das Leiden weitergehen. Peace.

  • instances of the United States overthrowing, or attempting to overthrow, a foreign government since the Second World War. (* indicates successful ouster of a government)

    China 1949 to early 1960s
    Albania 1949-53
    East Germany 1950s
    Iran 1953 *
    Guatemala 1954 *
    Costa Rica mid-1950s
    Syria 1956-7
    Egypt 1957
    Indonesia 1957-8
    British Guiana 1953-64 *
    Iraq 1963 *
    North Vietnam 1945-73
    Cambodia 1955-70 *
    Laos 1958 *, 1959 *, 1960 *
    Ecuador 1960-63 *
    Congo 1960 *
    France 1965
    Brazil 1962-64 *
    Dominican Republic 1963 *
    Cuba 1959 to present
    Bolivia 1964 *
    Indonesia 1965 *
    Ghana 1966 *
    Chile 1964-73 *
    Greece 1967 *
    Costa Rica 1970-71
    Bolivia 1971 *
    Australia 1973-75 *
    Angola 1975, 1980s
    Zaire 1975
    Portugal 1974-76 *
    Jamaica 1976-80 *
    Seychelles 1979-81
    Chad 1981-82 *
    Grenada 1983 *
    South Yemen 1982-84
    Suriname 1982-84
    Fiji 1987 *
    Libya 1980s
    Nicaragua 1981-90 *
    Panama 1989 *
    Bulgaria 1990 *
    Albania 1991 *
    Iraq 1991
    Afghanistan 1980s *
    Somalia 1993
    Yugoslavia 1999-2000 *
    Ecuador 2000 *
    Afghanistan 2001 *
    Venezuela 2002 *
    Iraq 2003 *
    Haiti 2004 *
    Somalia 2007 to present
    Honduras 2009 *
    Libya 2011 *
    Syria 2012
    Ukraine 2014 *

  • Why can't the US just leave the middle east alone? I'm sick of waking up everyday and watching the news about a new set of sanctions against my country. I'm sick of the US government always pretending to be the good guy and making us look like the bad one. We're still discovering bodies from the last war you imposed on us. Just leave us alone

  • The US is ruled by interests of the MILITAIRY INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX. The US is an OLIGARCHY. They will get their war, and it can escalate into WW3. It's disgusting to see american people support this. Wake the hell up, stop this mess. STOP YOUR WARS. DON'T START NEW ONES.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *